I love being a fake New Yorker. There are few other comforts right now that can put me in such a dizzying dazzling darling mood. Summer in the city? It's clear, it's clear, it's clear. I write in cafes. I read in parks. I do yoga on my fire escape. I walk around naked in my apartment with the curtains open to be that guy.
When it rains, I can see the reflections of the awesome skyscrapers in puddles, where the giant monolithic structures are extended from the sky and sent jutting into the depths of the earth. I say awesome in the old, biblical, almost angelic sense. Not that I believe skyscrapers to be images of the Divine, but they impress upon me such a sense of awe and mystery, humility. I am afraid. I am inspired.
In tandem with how I've been living my life for the past two years, every day I just start walking. Occasionally I have a destination, usually not, but I always arrive somewhere.
A double decker tour bus drives by, an elderly korean man points to something near me, everybody looks. I am exhilarated, for the people (who on this particular day are all looking absurd wearing their "SEE NYC" mandated yellow trash bags to keep dry) only see me as one of so many. A New Yorker. They don't know that I'm lost because I walk with determination and a firm step. I'm fooling them. As I do everyday, I am playing a part. I haven't lived here a month, but I sell it like I was born and raised. I am reveling in a performance of which I am the only true audience member. Like the groove your ass finds on the couch, so have my feet have found on the city sidewalks.
I feel just as much home here as I did in Erie, in Meadville, and honestly, in India. Is home where your heart is? Could it be your feet? Cause lately, I don't know where my heart isn't.
A dusty foot philosopher. (let's pretend this is more applicable this is)
They call me dusty coz my feet have been through a lot
The wisdom of my survival that's just due to a lot
So I'm not gonna sit here and whine like crushed grapes
My mind leaves you speechless like duct tape
You get more absurd every day and
ReplyDeleteI love it.